He's quite wrong in theory but okay in practice. By the time it reaches the home the PON laser has been split so many times the power level is pretty low so probably harmless. Not something to test repeatedly but that's how it is. His idea of a laser is a laser pointer: he's an installer not an optical engineer.
On unplugging or adapting the fibre it's fine. Every internal fibre connection in my home uses Invisilight with SC connectors so requires adaptors to convert to LC connectors to actually work with anything. The Openreach GPON has a flange and cable to adapt it from APC to UPC SC connector to feed my Huawei ONT, the YouFibre XGSPON has a flange and patch cable on it: didn't want the drop cable going into my cabinet.
I have
this and
this at home, apparently purchased on April 11th 2020, and clean both male and female sides of connectors every time I disconnect and repatch one.
He's actually kinda right about the shutter on the plug, too. ONTs don't start transmitting until they receive something, lasers on point to point fibre links negotiate transmit and receive power, they don't fire full bore straight away else they risk overloading the receiver on the other side, they are very careful until they receive something from the other side. Optical links negotiate power and, if they're so configured, speed. 1/10 Gbit negotiating optics are a thing.
From his point of view he's his eyesight and a bunch of successful installs. He doesn't need to know the details, just get things installed. He's likely gotten complacent about the laser light he's working with because he's been fine so often, and is fine with fibre connection as it's what he does day in, day out. I'm not convinced he'd have appreciated the conversation if it went down as you're describing and doubt it he'd have taken it on board beyond being polite in return.