Eight days ago, the telephone made its noise. I picked up the receiver of the bright red 300 series telephone that was beside me. The line was totally silent, so I waited two seconds and then clearly said "Hello". There was an audible click and then a lot of call-centre background noise.
Nuisance Caller: (With Asian accent) "Hello."
Grumpy b*cat: "Yes?"
NC: "Hello."
GBC: "Yes?" (With a more exasperated tone.)
NC: "Can I speak to the householder?"
GBC: "No." (Perfectly clearly, precise and to the point.)
NC: "Hello."
GBC: Parks the receiver in the "off the hook" position and gets on with what he was doing prior to the disturbance.
NC: "Hello." (five seconds) "Hello." (ten seconds) "Hello." (ten seconds) "Hello." Click.
GBC: Smiles to himself and decides to see how long the System X exchange will give me in a PG state before it connects my line to the "howler". After five minutes had passed, I decided it wasn't going to happen and replaced the receiver on the rest.
A little later on, I decided to see if there was a CLI recorded. Interrogating the system via a MF telephone, I was told that I was called by "01102079468675".
And the band played "Believe it if you like".