Kitz ADSL Broadband Information
adsl spacer  
Support this site
Home Broadband ISPs Tech Routers Wiki Forum
 
     
   Compare ISP   Rate your ISP
 
Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:

Author Topic: The Yuppie and the Farmer  (Read 1353 times)

broadstairs

  • Kitizen
  • ****
  • Posts: 2664
The Yuppie and the Farmer
« on: May 26, 2016, 07:57:13 AM »

A farmer named Sam was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in Hereford when
suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.  The driver, a young man in
a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes and RayBan sunglasses, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I
tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"  Sam looks
at the man, who obviously is a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers,
"Sure, why not?"  The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his
Cingular cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to
get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an
ultra-high-resolution photo.   
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image
processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.  Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that
the image has been processed and the data stored.  He then accesses an MS-SQL database through
an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes,
receives a response.  Finally, he prints out a full-colour, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP
LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."  "That's
right.  Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Sam.   
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man
stuffs it into the trunk of his car.  Then Sam says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what
your business is, will you give me back my calf?"  The young man thinks about it for a second and
then says, "Okay, why not?"  "You're a Member of the European Parliament", says Sam.  "Wow!
That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"  "No guessing required." answered
Sam.  "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I
already knew, to a question I never asked.  You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to
show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about how working people
make a living - or about cows, for that matter.  This is a herd of sheep.  Now give me back my dog.

Stuart
Logged
ISP:TalkTalk Connection:FTTC Cab:ECI Router:ZyXEL VMG3925-B10B

roseway

  • Administrator
  • Senior Kitizen
  • *
  • Posts: 38525
  • Penguins CAN fly
    • DSLstats
Re: The Yuppie and the Farmer
« Reply #1 on: May 26, 2016, 08:11:07 AM »

:lol:
Logged
  Eric

AArdvark

  • Kitizen
  • ****
  • Posts: 1008
Re: The Yuppie and the Farmer
« Reply #2 on: May 27, 2016, 06:24:15 AM »

Very funny :)

Sent from my LG G3 via Tapatalk (Typos & bad formatting are free)

Logged
 

anything